Thursday, October 15, 2009

The Flight Of The Falcon

The Flight of the Falcon, on cable TV,
Was followed by millions (including, yes, me),
Who watched as the media chased a balloon
And hoped against hope that they’d find the kid soon.

You ask why a knowledge of science is needed?
The info was there, though it wasn’t much heeded:
The size of the craft was decidedly small,
And it couldn’t have lifted young Falcon at all.

At five feet in thickness, and twenty feet wide,
The saucer held 600 cubed feet inside;
A hundred and fifty (or more) feet too few,
So flying was something the boy could not do.

(I cynically picture some geek on the staff
Who ran through the numbers and had a quick laugh,
Alerted the bosses: “there’s nothing to fear!”
“--But the ratings!” they said, “get your ass outta here!)

I realize, just now, at the end of my verse,
I really can’t figure which option is worse!
A cynical network, just jerking our chain,
Or science too tough for the news to explain!

Context, in case you live in a cave.

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3 comments:

EvoDog said...

Fantastic. The next Dr. Seuss!

jdhuey said...

Even if you didn't do the calcs (and I didn't) it was obvious from the way the balloon carried itself that there was no significant central mass. Just plain old naive intuitive physics was enough to know the kid was not on that flight.

Cuttlefish said...

I blush to admit... I did do the calcs, and did them wrong, to get the number in the verse. I suspect the number is close to correct, but it would be by coincidence and intuition, rather than by correct calculation.